For Couple: Choosing Love Vs Falling in Love?

 

First comes love, and then comes marriage. Then, well you know the rest of the song.

Since we were kids the idea of getting married because you’ve falling in love has been beaten into our brains. We’ve romanticized that moment when we fall in love, the feeling of butterflies in our stomach, and how love would then concur all.
 
All you need is love?
It would be great if it were that simple, but realistically speaking that initial stage of falling in love fades, and if you marry for love, you may divorce for a lack of it.
We all know that person who stayed in the wrong relationship because they loved the person. In their case, love should not have been enough.
Don’t get me wrong, love is important, and falling in love is one of the best feelings in the world, but what if you could choose to love someone instead of just falling for someone?
When researching happy and long lasting marriages, the feeling of love is rarely cited as a reason for why the marriage is successful. It is your commitment to loving acts, communication and admiration that builds a strong union.
You can choose to love someone every single day by showing up and by taking action that brings truth to those words. Your commitment to that declaration is what will make your relationship last. When choosing love, choose to share your life with the person you are most compatible with and who is as committed to your shared declaration of love as as you are.

Choose someone that shares your vision of the future and family

Does your purpose individually and together align with one another?
Where do you want to live?
How important is family to you?
Do you share a vision on having and raising kids?

Choose someone who shares your values

 
Do you have the same core values?
Do you share integrity and authenticity?

Are you both kind?

Are you both committed to something greater than yourself?

Choose someone who shares your interests

Having and experiencing interests that you both like together is cited as one of the most important factors in sustaining a happy relationship long term. You have to be able to enjoy each other’s company, not only in your downtime, but also in your activities.

Choose someone with a similar communication style

Can you communicate in a healthy way?
Are you able to resolve conflict and fight through adversity together?
Do your fights make you stronger?

Choose someone where there is understanding of one another

Communicating is different then understanding.
Do you get each other?
Do you share a point of view on the world?
When you don’t understand each other, do you accept each other’s differences?

Choose someone who you admire

Admiration is cited as the single most important factor in a long lasting and happy relationship. Admiration gives creates a feeling of pleasure and approval of your partner. Without it, your communication and understanding will lack, and respect for your partner will be lost.
When you choose love, a whole new world of possibilities is available to you and your partner.